I heard this on the radio while I was driving this morning and I almost crashed from laughing so hard.
A man was arrested last week at the Miami International Airport for having taped seven exotic snakes and three tortoises onto the inside of his pants while trying to walk through security. He stuffed them into women’s hoisery then used tape to secure them. When interviewed, officers gave credit to the “millimeter wave advanced imaging technology machine” for pointing out the suspicious items in his pants… not the moving bulge that they could probably see with their naked eye.
All the while this was happening in Miami, a woman was caught at the security at LAX for having two endangered birds wrapped into socks then taped onto her body. Seriously, that’s not only animal torture, but just a really uncomfortable 12 hour ride (she was going to China).